Parents are like gardeners who nurture their plants with care and help them grow.
The relationship between parents and children is priceless, yet at times, this very relationship can render a child's life worthless. All parents provide for their children’s basic needs, but very few actually nurture them.
A good example of this is a gardener who tends to his plants, ensuring that each one is placed according to its nature—some plants thrive in sunlight, while others need shade and wither in the sun. A plant that is cared for according to its nature will bear the best fruit; otherwise, it will remain in the garden, withered and lifeless, without yielding anything.
Many parents assume their responsibilities by fulfilling their child’s apparent needs, but at the same time, their negative behaviors destroy the child’s personality and mental health. They humiliate their children, set high expectations from an early age, impose unnecessary restrictions, scold, and physically punish them. They force them into careers of their choice, disregarding the child's interests. And when the child fails to achieve good grades, they blame them entirely for the failure.
Parental disagreements and household conflicts also negatively impact children, affecting their upbringing and mental well-being. Meanwhile, some parents’ negligence leads to children feeling ignored and suffering from lifelong deprivation. Such children seek the attention and love they never received from their parents elsewhere, often with dire consequences.
According to a UNICEF report dated June 11, 2024, nearly 400 million young children worldwide experience domestic violence.
Parents who encourage their children's misbehavior, such as lying, stealing, using foul language, and fighting, not only turn them into bad individuals but also contribute negatively to society.
When such children reach marriageable age, these parents often act unjustly toward them again. Some treat their children merely as ATMs, caring little for their happiness or mental well-being. Instead of genuine parental love, the relationship is driven by sheer selfishness. Out of fear of losing their comfort, they unnecessarily delay their child's marriage. If the marriage does happen, they create conflicts between the couple, leading to divorce, or burden their children with excessive financial responsibilities, leaving them unable to save for their spouse or children's future.
Providing for parents' basic needs is an obligation upon children, and ensuring their happiness is essential. Parents raise their children, provide good education, and sacrifice their own desires for them. However, here the discussion is about those parents who manipulate, destroy their child's life out of jealousy towards their daughter-in-law, and treat their children as mere pawns.
Similarly, many landowning or property-holding parents with a negative mindset ruin their daughters' lives. They delay their marriages under the pretext of caste, social status, or other excuses, waiting until they grow old so that their inheritance remains within the family. Even married daughters’ rightful shares are often taken away by their brothers, facilitated by parents who fail to distribute assets justly during their lifetime.
Considering a child's preferences in marriage is also crucial, but many parents fail in this aspect too. Some are so engrossed in their own lives that they pay no attention to their child's aging, while others treat their children as mere security for their old age. Some even arrange marriages without their children's consent.
Children are often expected to suppress their emotions for the sake of virtue. If the chosen spouse turns out to be of bad character or suffers from psychological issues, they are advised to endure it as their fate.
This is painful for both sons and daughters, but especially for daughters. A son may still escape a bad marriage, but where does a daughter go? She suffers before marriage and continues to endure after marriage, trapped in an environment similar to her parental home. She can neither move forward nor think of returning.
On the other hand, children raised poorly by their parents go on to ruin others' lives. Whether they fall into addiction or remain unemployed due to laziness, society always blames their spouse’s fate instead of acknowledging the parents' role in their downfall.
But it doesn’t end here—such parents, after pushing their children into a life of suffering, later complain in their old age that their children don’t care for them or have become disobedient.
They placed children who needed shade in the scorching sun and deprived those who needed sunlight. Now, what fruit do they expect from them? These children are already fighting their own battles—why burden them with another?
Undoubtedly, parents deserve respect, love, wealth, companionship, and their children's time. But aren't children also entitled to these things?
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